If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
What happened last night?
You soiled yourself again and told everybody that you'd given birth.
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
Just asked my dog if he was proud of me for making it home. That drunk.
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
Randomize
