i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't mean to be rude. But did you, by any chance, cut down a tree from my neighbors backyard last night? And did you also drag it to my yard and burn it?
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
Aren't you proud to know somebody who texts you "manifold facade" while dumping frozen colada mix into a blender of rum
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
I just woke and had to fish my phone out of a bowl of chili. I was wrist deep in it. WHO BROUGHT CHILI TO A PARTY?!
its not chili. and you brought it.
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