If i come over, it means nothing
Very drunk. laura says hi. i can't find my pants. i think i'm in philly, but it might be jersey somewhere
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
Randomize
