Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
Almost accidentally stole a baby... explain later
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
I smell like a brewery and I have been drinking for 7 hours. This seems like a perfect time to tell my husband I want a divorce.
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.