The sex was great until she started shouting, "Succeed!, Succeed!" Then it was like I was fucking a motivational speaker. Awkward.
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
What do I do when my mom and I both awkwardly spot the Rocky Horror parody porn sitting on the coffee table? Leave it or try to move it?
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
Go christen that room with your naked body.
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?