Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(828): View more from North Carolina

I am a bulletproof tiger!

(615): View more from Tennessee

Haha. Nice, be careful tonight.

(828): View more from North Carolina

I'm gonna have to get my windshield replaced. Is the keg beat?

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(856): View more from New Jersey

take the plastic off of my new air freshener and i'm not going to eat you out for a month.

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(604): View more from British Columbia

I just woke up on my kitchen floor using a yellow pages as a pillow and surrounded by plants that used to be in the garden around my apt building, can't wait to see the security tapes for my eviction

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(224): View more from Illinois

Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.

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23 Cringeworthy Responses to “I Love You”
Read it at the TFLN blog
(310): View more from California

If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is

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(716): View more from New York

If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.

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(248): View more from Michigan

btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese

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(952): View more from Minnesota

You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.

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(916): View more from California

You were so drunk you told some dude your life story in one short sentence... and kissed his fiancé. You're invited to the wedding.

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