You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
it only takes four glasses of wine for me to ride an elephant with a stranger.
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
Randomize
