He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
i'm getting the "you hooked up with my friends" speech from him. i'm returning with the "gotta keep my quota up" speech
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
An open call to all exes! i have a drunk text policy that requires i delete any and all texts after drink 3, however i have reason to believe i have done something stupid. if i have texted you that "I love you", "miss you" and/or conveyed any interest in getting back together with you in the last 24 hours i was belligerent and lying. That is all.
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
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