He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
Got blown by one of the bridesmaids. Family BBQ today. They all know. Talk about awkward.
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
Happy hour crawl turned into power happy hour turned into tequila shots turned into I'm drunk in class on Cinco de Mayo at 7 am.
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
Do you not realize that being Batman fulfills about 95% of my non-sexual fantasies?
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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