She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
drinking out of a sandbucket again
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
Remember when I made fun of you when you ran out of toilet paper on your brother's birthday and had to use coffee filters? Guess what happened today
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
I told him I might be pregnant and he said he'd buy me a test and a twix bar. I'm marrying him. Tomorrow.
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
Randomize