NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
I wasted some perfectly good semen on her
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
You kept trying to make cocktails with my protein powder last night...
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
My drug dealer is giving me a 15% veterans discount on my weed for nov 11th
That's the best thing I've heard all week.
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
The waitress at the Denny's in usa remembered me from 2 years ago when we went at 4 in the morning plastered, wearing overalls and huge inflatable corona hats on our heads
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
I'm having to shit out rocks
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