okay pat passed out under dana's car
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
Everybodys gonna want to make out w me dressed as big bird
Big bird is like some childhood daddy fantasy come true for carnival
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
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