Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
First drunken handjob: not successful. Second handjob, mostly sober: much better. Nightly news brought to you by me.
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
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