He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
Awkward moment: seeing and saying hey to the MILF you're sleeping with while shopping with your mother and sister.
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
I've literally slept one hour I'm honestly just surprised you can insult me this early
My life is far to together for someone who's such a hot mess inside
Randomize
