i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
A. What the fuck are period panties? B. Don't ever wear them around me... or bears.
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
I wish someone would just come knock on my door and fuck me already so that me and my stuffed animals aren't the only ones who see my amazing spring break tan. I'm not getting skin cancer so I can just sit here abstinent.
I feel as though sleeping all day due to the effects of prescription painkillers paid for by union insurance made this the most American day ever for me
A girl just asked me if we had pregnancy tests and a coworker had to stop me from telling her I was a pregnancy test. THAT is why I don't drink at work.
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
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