I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
note to self: an IV pole is no substitute for a stripper pole. Written it on my ankle cast.
He's reached the drunk point where he's trying to convince the family to buy falcons as pets. Can't wait to see how my steak turns out
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
that is very illegal...i love you.
Randomize
