btw ... thanks for not giving me up as the craigslist killer
i owe you one
thanks for snagging those panties for me
I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
I had a bacon mcgriddle for the first time today. It was like eating a baby angel.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
After being his wingman last night, I've decided I will never talk about becoming a lesbian ever again. Picking up chicks is way too hard.
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
I just crashed on my couch and have no intention of ever getting up again
I will be over with a bedpan and beer
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
TELL HER ABOUT THE GODDAMNED MOTHERFUCKING POTATOES
Randomize