So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
can you take me to a tanning bed
sure, why though?
i have to go once so i can blame these herpes on the tanning bed and she won't get suspicious
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me
he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york
Did I send you an asleep facebook message about the upcoming football season titled 'BRILLIANT' at 4:45 this morning?
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
He just snapchatted me a picture of his cock. The angle makes it look like a freakin skyscraper. Thinking of photoshopping a little monkey on it.
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
Randomize
