apparently i was offering everyone ambien and shouting, it's only like heath ledger if you want it to be!
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
Would love to except that I crashed into a hearse in a funeral procession about an hour ago so I think that pretty much put an end to my day.
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
Go tell your boss to go fuck himself because you have beer and doritos and zombies waiting on you
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
My mom wants to name our new dog the same name as my fuck buddy. This will be weird
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
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