People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
You know you have done too many drugs when you gum the sugar off your margarita without even thinking twice
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
Randomize
