I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
you made me have a moment of silence for the half of a sub sandwich that you dropped on the floor earlier
i'm surprised you didn't wake up. like i literally came when he was fingering me as i was spooning with you and all you did was mumble "that's a good idea, mom" and pull the sheets away from me.
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
When are your genitals available?
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
Randomize
