Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
Well, when you bump into your parents at a swingers meetup, it's time to change cities
This guy at the airport was telling me 3/4 dudes in his group got rufied at some strip club. One guy woke up in the hospital, another found himself in a random parking garage, the other got back to the room and they all shit their pants. Go Vegas.
Had a turkey baster with clean pee in it in my pants to pass a drug test, and the bottom fell off, so yeah I'm pretty pissed.
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
My dad sent me a 10 ft beer bong and my mom sent me ideas for future careers. I'll let you guess who my favorite parent is. Also, come over tonight. and bring beers.
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
Randomize
