No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
If someone made a breakfast cereal that was a cross between lucky charms and fruity pebbles and called it unicorn power with a huge fucking rainbow and a unicorn standing in a pot of gold on the box, they would be rich. Not only monetarily but spiritually as well...
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
Randomize
