So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
Eric just called. Says he's trapped in a cul de sac because the road disappeared. Wants me to tell him what street has the bushes that whisper sweet nothings into you ear and the wobbling purple pokemon. Oh, and a "bigger and better" penis is growing out of his belly button. He took shrooms by the way.
why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
she asked me if I wanted a handjob on the haunted mansion ride at Disney. was I suposed to say no?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
Right when I walked into the party my boyfriend stood up and yelled, "HEY TITS, GET ME A BEER!"
you will always have a special place in my vag
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
I'm getting married
To pizza
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
you tried to strip tease your way into canada but got arrested instead. don't worry, your mom doesn't know.
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