Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
The bend and snap? 98% success rate of getting attention. When used appropriately, it has an 83% rate of return on a dinner invitation.
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
A stripper choked me last night. Then I choked her. Now we're going on a date this Saturday.
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
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