I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
You know the commpass Jack Sparrow has? The one that just points at whatever you want? Thas pretty much my moral compass.
babies were throwing up all over the place
Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
there was a trapeze. enough said
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
I tried to think of the best possible thing I could do for my 30th birthday, and the finalist is "get a clit ring"
I farted in the parking garage and it echoed.
Randomize
