If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
Thank you for holding my bra last night while i did a topless lap around the house
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
I guess I called her at 2am, demanding that she bring us food. She told us to order pizza, and I yelled "DON'T MENTION PIZZA!" I recall nothing.
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
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