Will you blow on my dice?
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
the only evidence i have from this weekend existing is a title page for a novel i tried writing called "the oyster who gave up drinking"
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
If you already knew specifically that I was smoking a bowl in my remodeled bathroom AND THEN still wanted to initiate sexting, please proceed to the altar and marry me this instant.
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
Hatred of squirrels is the least of my hereditary problems.
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
Randomize
