i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
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that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
you slapped the bag of goldfish out of her hands and screamed, "BITCH THIS AINT NO AQUARIUM". That's how fucked up
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
The fake number she gave me was for Pappa John's. Now I have a large pepperoni on the way.
i know it looks like there's pee in the mayo jar in the fridge but i promise it's just apple juice that wouldn't fit in the jug after i added the booze.
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
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