Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
Please don't use social media to get back at me.
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
I just saw a Kleenex commercial and thought about last night. I'm sorry about your hair.
Need help. Super baked. Stuck on couch. Dying of thirst. Bring paint thinner or something to pry me off. Only thumbs and neck work.
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
In that case, if you come anywhere near my house you can expect to be chased down various streets by a half naked me wielding a baseball bat. No, I am not giving you my address.
Why so serious bruh
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
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