If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
Is it bad that I have more guilt over drunk eating Doritos than hooking up with my ex's best friend last night?
Two words: blizzard sex
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
Randomize
