Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
I am naked and annoyed.
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
You were sober bartending last night right?
Sorta. I remember you crying, ripping rose petals off the flower stem and slowly sprinkling them behind the bar at me and singing softly
Romantic
I’m the skeleton in his closet, but I only come out on Tuesday and Thursday afternoon and when his wife is out of town
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