just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
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I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
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How the fuck am I supposed to enjoy a third ice day from school if I only bought enough alcohol for 2?
I don't know, maybe act like an adult who teaches children for a living
It's like we're not even friends
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
So i walked around campus drunk and alone last night eating pizza and a lunchable from 7-11. Sat by the flag pole and drank an entire liter of water, took off my shoes to prance around in the fountain, then stepped in dog shit on the way home...barefoot.
You opened the door to your apartment and shrieked "THE CHAIR IS GONE!" then punted a bag of votive candles
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
so on a scale from morning glass of wine to that time i burnt the garage down how drunk were you last night
About 'lets tie a boat to a truck and ride it down the freeway'
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