i havee beer in my backseat and a glow in the dark condom in my cleaveage.
you're going for the gold here.
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
Found a left over fake Olympic medal from our party last weekend. Awarded it to a random girl in the bar last night. Its the only thing she was wearing this morning when she woke up at my place.
You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
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