i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
My New Years Resolution was to get a girl I dont know pregnant. 8 months later I can check that off the list..
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
i ended up making out with my new neighbor in a stranger's car that we found unlocked on a driveway somewhere. apparently drunk self never say "no" to adventure.
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
Your roommates will be treating you to many anecdotes about my intentions to have aggressive sex with you. I'm sorry in advance.
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