We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
I just came out of my doctor's office and i look into the window and i see a guy sitting in the front seat getting head.
why are you so shocked? you live in brooklyn.
I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
I have a fruit stripe tattoo on my penis. You're the only person I know who chews that gum.
I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
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