It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
Spending 4 hours in the emergency room today tells me that your birthday party was a success.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
Good news!! I can adult!! π turning down the strip club on a weeknight has become my crowning achievement ππ
I forget how to act sober
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