I have funfetti in my underwear...will you come get me?
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
Today I made my parents proud-spent the afternoon floating around in their pool drinking beer-which I would ask my nephews to get for me out of the fridge
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
Randomize
