I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
she went home with me because she said i reminded her of paul rudd. remind me to thank him for his awkwardness
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
All right, sex is off the menu for you. Now you just get friendship. So I can spend marginally less time being annoyed by you.
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
I ditched my one night stand in the hotel lobby. How did he add me on Snapchat?
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
He told me he was cooking me a special dinner tonight. His "five star meal" was popcorn in champagne glasses, and chic fil a sauce in jello shot containers to dip the popcorn in. He still tries to convince me he doesn't smoke weed anymore.
that may or may not have been my penis.
Randomize
