Come see our sink grown plant.
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
Woke up with chlamydia and a bruised rib. I'd say my boss is gonna be mad about me not showing up to work, except you know.. it's her fault.
I feel like there should be a 'roommate information section' of the paperwork when there's a chance you'll be given pain killers.
Randomize
