We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
my sisters under your porch take her home
There's a walmart bag of my vomit outside my front door. I just really need someone to appreciate that with me.
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
Just hungoverly hit my funny bone with a hot straightener. Triple threat.
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
She carried my bag of puke down the aisle and the flight attendant wouldn't move the beverage cart so she put the puke bag in the flight attendant's face and said "I have a bag of sickness!" I've never seen a cart move that fast.
Your dress got me laid by one of Obama's Secret Service members. Patriotic duty, check.
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
I woke up this morning and I had the absolutely horrific realisation that I am the human incarnation of scrappy doo
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
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