I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
can u get pink eye on your cock?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
She told me I was lying in front of her toilet for an hour saying "lasers."
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
He said my vagina smelled like pomegranates. Its like my vagina is the fountain of youth.
I hope no one at work can tell or smell that I have tequila in my hair and I haven't showered for days
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