Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
you know it's bad when you need sunglasses to open the refrigerator
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
I canceled a date last night to eat pop tarts and go to bed early
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
Randomize
