Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
Three questions... How drunk were you? How long until we can make fun of you for this? Do you even really need a spleen?
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
life lesson #151: dont let people go batshit crazy and stab you in the knee
i will live by this rule
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
Sitting beside a stoned cat on the kitchen floor eating cheesecake with my hands...just a struggle
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
Randomize
