I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
She ate the cookie then went to the emergency room. Now her fam is pressing charges. Don't people understand you DON'T steal baked goods from potheads??
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I tried to get you something for Valentine's Day too but they said they couldn't deliver skittles and ecstasy :(
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
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