i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
She loves me even though she knows all Ive done. Shes kind of like jesus.
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
We tried to play tennis but after about 15 minutes we gave up and fucked against the fence. Woulda been a cute third date so of course I had to ruin it.
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
Randomize
