well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
life lesson# 3: saying thank you on a subway really means "im not a native new yorker, so please feel free to touch my ass"
hmm. interesting. explain how you came across this knowledge.
i sneezed. he said bless you. i said thank you. he groped. i again said thank you.
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
I sent my roommate a text from MY phone that said, "I don't know where my phone is." Must've been a good night.
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
Hi,\n\nYou left your underwear in my Uber. Thanks and bye.
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
Randomize
