I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
Just cleaned someone else's sperm off of my bedroom wall. Never throwing a house party again.
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
My dad just accidentally taught me how to make fake IDs. I love my life.
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
Randomize
