either we just had an earthquake or I am really good @ masturbating
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
My mom and dad are smoking a joint while lecturing me on what to bring and how to act in Europe. I'll finish this glass of wine and head over.
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
Randomize
