Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
It's Saturday night and I'm sitting on my couch by myself, watching Glee, and drinking gin and tonics. If you listen very closely, you can hear the wails of my mother giving up hope that I will ever give her a son-in-law.
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
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