Dude go to the top of pikes peak right now to catch Kevin Bacon's band performing
The bacon? Yeah right. What if there's Tremors?
Him and Burt have already taken care of that. It's a once in a lifetime chance to catch the Bacon brothers live in concert. I sort of have a boner
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
I really don't want to. I just don't know how to nicely say "dude I'm having a rough time in life right now and I just need to dress like a stripper cop, get shit faced, and have dirty crazy sex"
Throwing up so forcefully that toilet water hits you in the face is not what the Pilgrims and Indians had in mind for this holiday
My goal for tonight is to swipe my debit card through those weird rolls on the back of a big bald guy's head.
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
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