Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
dude, i think i am in a porno. I was working out at the hotel gym and some chick was doing yoga and a guy comes up and says "good, now i know your flexible" then they started making out. WTF?
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
You do realize it's a Tuesday, right?
You do realize I stopped giving a fuck about calendars when I was 10, right? And besides, it could be the best Tuesday of your life.
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
I just got checked out by a paramedic whilst their sirens were on. I'm doing something right
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
Seriously though, I walked in and he was holding my cat in the air singing "the circle of life"...
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