Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
it was only during my walk of shame that i realized i was wearing the exact same outfit that julia roberts wears on the dvd cover or pretty woman. prostitution is my destiny.
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
there is absolutely nothing wrong with two grown men staying up all night blowing lines drinking white wine and playing call of duty. don't judge me
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
When he busted out the ketchup I got the hell out of there. It got really creepy really fast.
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